Types of Coping Mechanisms and How to Be Emotionally Resilient

Oct 25, 2024 | Ebru Yildirim
 life coach

Coping mechanism is a general term used to describe how individuals respond to or handle negative or overwhelming emotions, like stress, anxiety, and grief. It refers to our behaviours or reactions that allow us to calm down and remain functional during difficult situations.

There are different types of coping mechanisms, but they can be classified into five main styles depending on how you process the situation or information. There are also dysfunctional and healthy ways to cope. Dysfunctional coping mechanisms include destructive thoughts and behaviours that may offer temporary relief but are harmful to health and well-being in the long run. On the other hand, healthy coping mechanisms are sustainable skills that enable us to build emotional resilience and overcome adversity.

Defense Mechanisms vs. Coping Mechanisms

Both coping and defense mechanisms enable individuals to deal with stress and other uncomfortable emotions. However, their long-term effects on health and well-being differentiate them from each other.

Defense mechanisms are unconscious techniques that only arise when confronted with stress, whether internal or external. They are behaviours you are not aware of that distract you from a triggering situation, traumatic experience, or anything that threatens your identity. Defense mechanisms tend to distort or deny reality by repressing your emotions or projecting them onto other people.

Coping mechanisms are conscious efforts that allow individuals to manage or navigate challenging situations. While the goal is always to alleviate stress or discomfort, not all coping mechanisms are healthy or effective, as some may lead to more complications.

5 Main Types of Coping Mechanisms

types of coping mechanisms

To explain how the five main types of coping mechanisms vary from each other, we cited the same issue or problem as an example and provided alternate responses.

1. Emotion-Focused

Emotion-focused coping mechanisms involve managing how you feel toward a stressor instead of or before solving the problem. By shifting your attention to what you can change, you reduce emotional reactions to events beyond your control. You may not address the problem directly, but you’re at least able to lessen how it affects you.

Example: You receive a rejection letter for something you applied for. To deal with the situation, you unload your disappointments in a journal and then watch a movie to prevent yourself from dwelling on the problem or do other things to regain a positive disposition.

2. Problem-Focused

Problem-focused coping mechanisms involve facing or addressing the issue as it arises. They’re about defining the problem and finding solutions or alternative approaches to eliminate the stressor at its source.

Example: You receive a rejection letter for something you applied for. You identify points for self-improvement and try to avoid making the same mistakes.

3. Avoidance-Focused

Avoidance-focused coping mechanisms involve withdrawing from a present situation that is causing stress. Individuals with this coping style are inclined to seek distractions, procrastinate, or do anything else to steer clear of the issue or problem. While avoidance may offer instant relief, it is fleeting and may exacerbate stress, contributing to chronic anxiety, guilt, and low self-esteem.

Example: You receive a rejection letter for something you applied for. To avoid disappointment, you don’t apply for the same thing or do other things besides sending out applications.

4. Meaning-Focused

Meaning-focused coping mechanisms involve making sense of a stressful experience by finding a purpose or reason why it happened that could benefit them at present or in the future. They reinterpret the scenario and draw their perspectives from their beliefs and values, which could be personal, spiritual, cultural, or environmental.

Example: You receive a rejection letter for something you applied for. You believe everything happens for a reason, and that particular opportunity is not intended for you at this time, or you’re destined for something better.

5. Support-Seeking

Support-seeking coping mechanisms involve seeking emotional or instrumental assistance, guidance, or comfort from a social group, community, or licensed professional to manage stress and resolve a problem. Also called social coping, individuals may reach out to their family and friends, talk to a life coach or therapist, or participate in a support group to gain new insights or perspectives.

Example: You receive a rejection letter for something you applied for. You come to your family or friends for advice or to remind you that better opportunities are coming your way. You may also consider getting life coaching to clarify your goals and for tips on moving past setbacks and limitations.

Examples of Dysfunctional Coping Mechanisms

Dysfunctional Coping Mechanisms

Dysfunctional coping mechanisms include destructive thoughts and behaviours that may offer temporary relief but are harmful to health and well-being in the long run. These are also referred to as ineffective or maladaptive coping strategies.

  • Constant Busyness

    To avoid dealing with stressful situations or uncomfortable emotions, individuals will constantly make themselves busy or unavailable.

  • Over or Underreacting

    Overreacting to a situation can indicate that an individual is struggling with pent-up emotions and overwhelmed by stress. They may yell, jump to conclusions, dramatize the situation, or lash out at people. Conversely, underreacting can mean you’re suppressing your emotions and pretending as if the problem does not exist. As a result, you fail to set boundaries, causing the negative situation to happen again or people taking advantage of you.

  • Toxic Positivity

    Toxic positivity involves trivializing or downplaying how bad a situation is. While having a positive outlook is good and admirable, you should still be able to acknowledge and validate negative emotions. Instead of disregarding negativity, grow from it.

  • Overthinking

    Overthinking is when you focus too much on the problem or overanalyse a situation. Instead of thinking of solutions, your thoughts devolve into an endless loop of worst-case scenarios, causing inaction or analysis paralysis. It is a coping mechanism common to those with anxiety and depression.

  • Self-Isolation

    Self-isolation involves withdrawing from your friends, family, and other social groups. It’s okay to embrace solitude to cool off or reflect, but prolonged isolation may push people away, preventing you from getting the help you need or maintaining healthy relationships.

  • Perfectionism

    Being a perfectionist can prevent you from responding to and managing setbacks effectively. You may feel helpless, stuck, and like a failure after not achieving your goals, but none of these feelings are accurate since everyone encounters obstacles in their journey to success. Your ego, pride, or stubbornness may inhibit you from asking for help or accepting that some things simply cannot and should not be accomplished alone.

  • Venting

    Venting may cause you to dwell on the issue, especially if you’re not talking to the right person. When you’re just ranting your problem to anyone willing to listen, you may not be open to exploring solutions. In some cases, the wrong person may magnify the issue or give poor advice, contributing to more stress. If you need support, seek individuals who have your best interests at heart and will inspire you to move forward with an impactful decision.

  • Substance Abuse

    To escape a stressful situation or numb themselves, some individuals may cope by smoking, drinking alcohol, or resorting to drug use.

  • Procrastination

    To avoid stress, some people procrastinate or delay tasks until the last minute, which may sacrifice the quality of work or cause them to miss deadlines.

  • Eating Too Much or Too Little

    Some people may overindulge their cravings or eat too much to distract themselves and compensate for the stress they’re feeling, contributing to obesity, diabetes, and heart disease, among other health conditions. On the other hand, some people lose their appetite when confronted by stress, eating too little, and denying their bodies the essential nutrients needed to function.

  • Impulsive Spending

    Some people handle stress by making impulsive purchases, causing them to spend way beyond their means and take on debt.

  • Oversleeping

    To avoid dealing with problems, some people seek comfort in their beds and sleep way more than they should. They wake up disappointed with unresolved issues, making them want to sleep again. This vicious cycle may eventually lead to depression.

  • Self-Harm

    To release negative emotions or distract themselves from intrusive thoughts, some people may inflict harm on themselves.

Examples of Healthy Coping Mechanisms

healthy coping mechanisms

Healthy coping mechanisms are sustainable skills that enable us to build emotional resilience and overcome adversity. These are effective and adaptive coping strategies that do not have damaging consequences.

  • Cognitive Reframing

    Cognitive reframing is the process of shifting your negative perspective by replacing flawed thought patterns with more optimistic and realistic ones. It’s being able to acknowledge an overwhelming emotion before pivoting their attention to the positive aspects of their life.

  • Meditation and Breathing Exercises

    Meditation and breathing exercises can help quiet the mind, reducing stress while enabling your body to relax. These mindful practices allow you to regain control of your nervous system, regulate your emotions, and give you the clarity to handle or face the problem.

  • Journaling

    Journaling can be a therapeutic coping mechanism that allows you to release and reflect on your thoughts and feelings, addressing fear, stress, anxiety, anger, sadness, and other uncomfortable emotions without judgement. It may also help you develop ideas or solutions to your problem.

  • Forgiveness

    Being human makes us all flawed, imperfect, and prone to mistakes. When we are more forgiving towards others and ourselves, we reduce or limit how a transgression affects us emotionally and mentally. Letting go of some anger and frustration can reduce our stress. People may offend us, but holding on to that grudge is how they continue to punish us.

  • Laughter

    As the saying goes, laughter is the best medicine. Laughing can serve as an outlet for negative emotions. Humor can be a positive distraction that eases tensions by stimulating our psychological system to regulate stress and moods.

  • Positive Thinking

    Similar to cognitive reframing, positive thinking is about finding something good in a bad situation.

  • Seeking Help

    Consulting a life coach or confiding in a trusted family member, friend, or colleague allows you to communicate a need and seek help, reducing stress and helping you develop stronger connections.

  • Controlled Distraction

    Not all distractions are bad. You also need to take a break from the problem or stressful situation to come back with fresh solutions or a calmer headspace.

  • Exercise

    Exercise offers many health benefits, including regulating stress. It allows you to focus on a physical activity, enabling you to listen and respond to your body’s needs while stimulating endorphins to help improve your moods.

How a Life Coach Helps Build Emotional Resilience With Effective Coping Mechanisms

A life coach can guide you to become more emotionally resilient by increasing your self-awareness. They will help you identify situations or instances that trigger a stressful reaction and pinpoint defense mechanisms or dysfunctional coping mechanisms you may have been doing. They will also push you outside your comfort zone so you can explore and adjust to new ways to cope.

A life coach will help you gain confidence in yourself, empowering you to prioritise and practise healthy coping mechanisms. They will supervise your progress and recognise your efforts to reinforce your commitment to changing negative thought patterns and keep you motivated. Soon enough, you will have the emotional resilience and agility to overcome challenges. You’ll know which adaptive coping strategy will help you self-soothe and resolve a particular problem

Remember, you don’t have to face your problems alone. If you’re looking for a life coach in Dubai or Abu Dhabi, please feel free to contact us. At Unlocked Potentials, we help individuals manage and cope with stressors so that they can take control of their lives and achieve their biggest dreams.